Short Lame Jokes Galore

Why did the BALD MAN cut a hole in his pocket ?

So he could run his fingers through his HAIR !





A man walks INTO a bar..

It hurts





Knock-knock

whos there ?

Dr

Dr.who ?

Yup





John got into a bus on the 1st of April , when the conductor asked for a ticket , he paid Rm 2 and got one ticket from the conductor and took the ticket and said " HAHA , april's fool ! I already have a ticket ! "





It was Susan's first day doing her new job. She worked till late in the evening on the computer. Her boss was pleased and asked her why did she work until so late , Sarah replied " keyboard letters not in order , so i made it alright "





One romantic day , Joe's girlfriend asked him " Darling , on our wedding day , will you give me a Ring ? "
Joe answered " sure , from Landline or Mobile ? "





Two bomb mechanics were fixing a bomb
mechanic 1 : What happens if the bomb explodes while you are fixing it ?
mechanic 2 : No worries , I have a second one here





Why didnt the skeleton go to the party ?

Because he didn't have anyBODY to go with





A man had been in jail for ten years. On the morning he was let out he ran down the street shouting 'I'm free, I'm free!'

And a little boy on the other side of the road said 'that's nothing, I'm four'.





Why is a mosquito better than a fly ?

Because a mosquito can fly and a fly cant mosquito ! [ hear the crickets ?]





What did the Pink Panther say when he stepped on an ant?

Dead ant. Dead ant, dedant dedant dedant dedant....





What day is the hottest day of the week?
Fri-day