26/7 : Part 2 updated
Firstly, i woud like to say that Teck Huat is the quiet type and Kar Jun is the 1st or 2nd in the whole form.
I only heard the convo halfway.
Kar Jun :
You don't on the computer for one month will die or not? I tell you ah . . . you off your computer for one month the virus sure die. Beause they got no food to eat!
Teck Huat :
But the virus can puasa (fast) . . .
Kar Jun :
Nevermind. Then you off it for 1 year lah. Then the virus will die from malnutrition. Like beri-beri ah . . . marasmus ah . . . rickets ah . . .
Part 2 : The Following Day
Kar Jun :
Are you sure 1 antivirus is good enough? Work 24 hours a day. . Somemore no bonus.
Teck Huat :
My antivirus software (BitDefender) got win ICSA award . . .
Kar Jun :
1 where got enough? Should at least have 2 --- One morning shift one night shift. If he want to go shopping then how?
Teck Huat :
Antivirus how to go shopping . . .
Kar Jun :
Neh --- Got eBay ma.
Saturday, July 26, 2008
Kar Jun & Teck Huat : How To Destroy the Virus in You Computer Part 1 & 2
Friday, July 25, 2008
Q: Why cant the skeleton go to the school's prom ??
A: Because he have no-body to go with.
Q: Did you hear about the man who lost his whole left side?
A: He's all-right now
I went to the butcher's yesterday, and bet him fifty dollars that he couldn't reach the meat on the top shelf.
He said, 'no, the steaks are too high."
Joy at the Chinese Class 2
It was the holidays and we were to go back to school for extra classes.
Our teacher brought some tea for us to drink. Then a teacher walked past our class and our teacher offered her some tea.
She said : "Wah, very delicious ah . . . What type of tea is this? Chinese tea?"
Our teacher replied : "No,
Taiwan tea."
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You'll need to understand Bahasa Melayu and Mandarin for this next one.
During Chinese class, Johnny suddenly asked everyone : "Who is anak emas here?"
哈哈! 你是'金'子!
Thursday, July 24, 2008
Technology and Ian's question
Yesterday in school , during eanligh period , we were asked to do an essay exercise which offered 5 titles to choose from and one of it was...
' Technology is making man lazy. Discuss '
Then I heard Ian telling Ryan who were both sitting at the back of me " Why technology making man lazy ? Why man only ? Woman won't get lazy ah ? "
Shaun : I'm Sorry
It wad a really hot day in school and everyone was sweating.
Me : It's so HOT today!
Shaun [pats me on the back] : "I'm sorry"
Wednesday, July 23, 2008
Tuesday, July 22, 2008
Big Big Blunders : Johnny Ho (Plus an extra bonus = Ho ho ho)
A group of boys were teasing each other. Halfway through, this happened.
A : "Your brain proess so slow."
B : "But my brain is Pentium 5."
A : "So what . . My brain Pentium 6."
Johnny Ho : "Mine is Vista!"
On an unrelated topic,
SYDNEY,Australia — He is an unlikely revolutionary, but this Christmas, Santa is a rebel with a claus.
He is having the last laugh on political correctness — and it's a great big fat belly laugh.
Santas across Sydney, Australia, are rebelling against attempts to ban their traditional greeting of "ho, ho, ho" in favor of "ha, ha, ha."
Recruitment firm Westaff — which supplies hundreds of Santas across the country — has told its trainees that the "ho ho ho" phrase could frighten children and could even be derogatory to women.
Two Santa hopefuls reportedly quit the course because of the hullabaloo of the ho, ho, ho.
One would-be Santa has told The Daily Telegraph he was taught not to use "ho, ho, ho" because it was too close to the American slang for prostitute. He also quit.
"Gimme a break," said Julie Gale, who runs a campaign against sexualizing children called Kids Free 2B Kids. "We are talking about little kids who do not understand that 'ho, ho, ho' has any other connotation, and nor should they."
"Leave Santa alone," she added.
Westfield's Santas are recruited and trained by RegProm Marketing and they will be "ho, ho, ho-ing," a Westfield spokeswoman said.
"Part of our advice to our Santas is that they should be mindful of children having their first Santa experience," she added. "We ask our Santas to try techniques such as lowering their tone of voice and using 'ha, ha, ha' to encourage the children to come forward and meet Santa. We wish you and your family a very merry Christmas."
Monday, July 21, 2008
Big Chicken, Small Chicken
One day, Ali went to a restaurant and ordered a Chicken Chop
When his Chicken Chop was served, he was shocked at it's size.
He called the waiter and complained:
" Why this chicken so small, yesterday I ordered the same thing but it was two times bigger than this."
The waiter ask : Where did you seat yesterday ?
Ali : There, right beside the window. But wad does it got to do with the size of the chicken.
Waiter : Of course it does. Our manager told us to serve big portions to customer that seat beside the window, so that passer-bys can see.
Sunday, July 20, 2008
17+ Jokes (read at your own risk)
*Disclaimer - Not my jokes , its funny and therefore posted here as an obscene label/section has already been set-up , if you find these jokes offensive for any reason , please let me know so I can remove it , DO NOT READ IF YOU ARE SOMEONE OF PURITY LIKE PANG YOKE FEI *
John is engaged to Sara , finally the day came when John finally got to go to Sara's house and meet the family. When John first walked in to the house , he noticed Sara's SUPER HOT sister Lilly. Through out the night , Lilly was staring at John and John was not at all oblivious to this but pretended like he didn't know.
This went on for 2 months before John and Sara decided to get married. Two days before the marriage , John went over to Sara's house for the final checks on the wedding plans. Upon reaching the house , John went up to the door and knocked and was greeted by Lilly , Lilly invited him in and said " My whole family are out with Sara getting her ready for the big day and will be back in two hours , its just you and me now " .
John then said " No worries , I'll sit here and read te papers until they come home " and went over to the sofa and sat. 5 minutes later , Lilly went up to John , and ran her hand over his shoulders and said , " If you need anything , I'll be in my room , and just so you know , I find you very attractive and would do anything for you " and then went upstairs.
John sat there for 2 minutes before standing up and walking to the main door and went out towards his car where upon exiting the house , he saw his father-in-law walking towards him . His father-in-law cried and hugged John and said " Well done my son , you have passed our family's loyalty test towards my daughter Sara , it was a very wise choice for you to walk out of the house and not give in to lust , welcome to the family " .
John and Sara got married and lived happily ever after.
What's the moral of the story ?
Keep your condoms in your car !
It was a fine day in Superhero land , Superman was flying around the neighbourhood scouting for baddies when he suddenly flew across an apartment and noticed through one of the open windows that Wonder Woman was lying on her bed without any clothes on and since he always had a thing for Wonder Woman , he used his lightning speed and flew in and satisfied himself and flew out and away all in less then 2 seconds
Meanwhile , Wonder Woman did not have a clue what just happened although she noticed something different and asked " What just happened ? "
A voice came out " Some gay b******d just sodomised me ! "
It was Invinsible man who was all the while on top of wonder woman !
Funny Emoticon Combos - Brought to life
Here's a list of emoticons we are using to make our combos :
Look what they have made it into :
(Not sure who, could've been Ian, Ken Chang or Lester or someone else.)
And look what Tanzy (his is the 1st one) and I did :
Here's a candid shot we had when Shaun called Wei Kwang and he turned around only to see the camera pointed at him :
But nothing beats Lester's and Tun Hong's creativity.
Ahaha! Got aura somemore!
Originally there were only "auras"(reflections) below his hand. But thanks to Photoshop magic and a bit of patience . . .
